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Now I'm yawning incessantly, the stroke can't be far off! Don't be careless! Several times in the recent past, I've caught myself drooling from the mouth. My own weakness and mistakes, are the only things which haunt me. My car is stuck in the reverse gear. Poverty, like cancer, is a very real affliction, that can happen to all of us. Pretty girls march up and down the runway, in fuzzy sweaters this year. Who, what shithead could care about this? Even the self satisfied, get sick of themselves. Well, what do you know, there was an indoor pool, all the time. The outbursts and guffaws, aren't contagious anymore. Trust few, if any. The challenges we face, have never been more clear. We are one architecturally challenged country. There are no excuses, alibi's, slide aways. My jailhouse (I keep repeating myself) photos, don't do me justice. Someone would have calmly told me, to get down off the dash. Fists of fury, break the lamp. It becomes an hour jaunt, totally unplanned. The married people should flaunt it. Don't allow yourselves to get too good at bullshitting yourselves. Insanity, or worse, is not a wise career move. Another evening at the Honey Bun! We are the only thing keeping, or holding, our own selves back. The consensus is reached, it's only after you find X marks the spot, that the treasure can be found. Never before has it been so clear, what it is that I've been doing wrong, all these years. Having left, I can describe it like a recipe. I never even heard of the St. Anthony Motel. Take a clear look at where you are, and how it is you've come to be there. People don't like to read scathing, angry, negative things, thus, I'm out of business, before I even opened. Be aware that the digestive system can make strange sounds, and do even weirder things. Emphysema, or worse, has got a grip on me. The police are coming under heavy scrutiny, perhaps it's for the best. Despite the difficulty there can sometimes be, in doing so, we must inspire and influence ourselves. My “sensitive artist” days, are over. I crashed the lesbian sit in/ happening. The widespread killing and pandemonium, has spread up here. I’m mental, and it’s too late to get help, in fact, I don’t want any help. The speed of dark, is as fast as light. The embankments looked so much more beautiful, back then. I've stupided my way around the sandbox, long enough. I do not care what holiday is coming up, kindly, get the plush, bean bag bunny, out of my face. There is no one to share this with. With both parents working, living in even the dingiest apartment, is still, almost impossible. My dreams will never come true, but a diligent, follow through, with a plan, just might do the trick. This is not my home, I do not belong here. Most of us carefully plan our own troubles. These bags under my eyes, don't indicate glad tidings. Our arrangements tend to be one-sided. No longer "upset with ourselves," anyway, the goal is to do something stupid, that is really smart. Freeze dried pets, last longer, and hold their shapes better, than those that are merely, stuffed. This guy could be the most perverted person on the face of the Earth, who's not in prison. Somehow or the other, I became a loser, funny how things work, and don't. Starting at the bottom, does not work, try a different way. Puppies and kittens are probably still the cutest thing going, all told. There is no "mysterious anything," anywhere! The pus oozes. The important thing to do is leave, forget the "reasons not to," there are always going to be excuses. The panic before setting out to make a living, is really only the energy that you need to get you going, moving in the right direction, that is, forward. These planetary orbits were not planned with humans in mind. The smiles hide the pain, shame, utter humiliation. I wonder whatever happened to that one bitch I talked to, out by the tree, in front of that one house, that night that I was wasted. There are at least four books in this one, it’s driving me absolutely insane. We all want a crotch to lick.