Push beyond your own mind. Soon, there will be violence. All the bunting and ornamentation, was color coordinated. It’s all a bunch of tricks, to dull our senses. There is no safety or security, anywhere. It used to be a gas station. Now, I will respond. Opera doesn’t sound right, in English. Some booze was spilled (it never ends). Poke the log, with this specially designed poker. Just, be aware! The gears have switched, the coveted mug, was thrown through the glass block window. Remember Don’s hair, and airbrush the penis out. We’re on the hayride, to reduce the risk. Announce to the central business district, that you’re coming. I used to be miserable, then, I was fine, now, I am miserable again. I got the curse that keeps on cursin’. It isn’t just a feeling (no, not anymore). We suffer for our inadequacies, especially in this town. The front of the car was all smashed in, because it was designed wrong. Someone wrote maggots and faggots, on my folder. I drooled on the photo of the ninth grade basketball team, but then, wiped it off (girls). Forget those assholes with the haircuts. Pick the skinny girl first, in dodgeball (or, the other). They posed in front of the fuckin’ gas pump. I started dancing like a caretaker, after the laundry revolution, passed me by (um, gin?). A bunch of boring college assholes, ruined the disturbance, with their loud mouths. He called me a negress, I wore women’s figure skates, and went around and around the rink. They put me into some sort of jail, and the only thing there was to eat, was my own semen. The dickheads stormed the basilica, with flags. Well, I got really horny, and said something stupid (at the third annual derby). There is another Cleveland. I got wasted on the goddamn train, and got off by mistake, in some half ass town, ready to rock, I ended up spending a few confusing days in jail (county, unknown). If you can survive high school, Hollywood would be a damn cake walk, with consolation prizes. Morning is some kind of sour squeeze. Did I mention the bunghole lipgloss, and that one asshole? Everywhere I looked, reefers, high people, paranoia, sunshine. It’s all so flawless. I can’t remember if I had sex like, an animal, or with, an animal, in New Orleans. To sit on the dock, alone, with a head full of thoughts. My life, hurts. The hardest thing to do, is just be. They checked to see if I stole anything from their boathouse. The rich, are mostly asshole’s (around here). The coke whore slut, from the ghetto, is a sensation, now (guess who?). Another ride in your damn truck? Quiet down, Vermont head! It’s just… a bunch of meaningless statements. Sorry that I bore you. Nobody ever tried. Put that in past tense (the millennium). It was as if I was there, again (somehow). Several days of this, hasn’t led to that. None of the town clocks, work, they haven’t, in years. Go for architecture! Thank goodness, that all of the college girls saw through my surface charm. Sometimes, one word can make all the difference (but, not often). I can’t say that I’ve ever read anything quite like this, before. I’m just trying to tell you what’s happening. Go to the fat farm, then (what do you want me to do?)! Smell the air, come harvest time. It’s probably better, to be dead. Shock and disrupt, the innocent bystanders. We should’ve, could’ve, would’ve… every goddamn one of us. I never said that I knew (she did). These are our graves (cheers!). No more promotions. I like the rhythm of the way that the neon sign flashes into my room. It’ll slide down the drain. I never could get the math. Drunks shouldn’t gamble (all addictions are the same). I don’t fit in, mix well with others, I’m not a good communicator (read, freak). He (I) did it the old fashioned way (the way it used to be done). Agent Orange took care of the green, and the rest of us, as well. I’ve got to prove that this is the pudding (it is so easy to get it all wrong). We explored, ate out, made fools of ourselves (especially with the drinking). The party was too small. Don’t wave when you drive by, it brings back bad memories. I’m swell (ahem). She (they) know(s) how much I want her (them). The game is ridiculous. No, it most certainly will not, correct itself. Feel free to add in, or take away, at will. Some editor, somewhere, somehow, will fuck this book up, and ruin it, for you, the reader. Legs wrapped around, soft moans, up the scale, to shrieks, sputters and starts. It may be time to put another record on, this one is total hodge! You believed me (old, dumb joke). There were quite a few stores, out in the country. If you don’t do it now, when in the hell do you plan on doing it? He mumbled amidst a virtual crow symphony. It was some kind of celebration of the moon (indoors). Wound up tightly in woe, grief, shame, despair? I know that it seems stupid, it is. Height ratios, and the instant hard-on. Wiggle in and out of the truth box. Why did I write that they wouldn’t miss the beauty? No matter how hard you try, you probably, will. Figure out the, “not two.” The riddle is hidden in the poem.
Vomit into the rusty trash can, shoot out the windows of the old car, impart some nonsense, and leave quickly. She had unusual taste in stationary, they found her walking around in circles. We made the mistake of assuming that we were interesting. Carry the basket around with you. The reason that I tore out all my teeth was because I was picking up short wave radio signals, in a foreign language. In other news, St. Sorry, the twelfth century cannibal, was canonized today. The vertigo of presentiment, will make you orange, and deranged. Hark, for it will be made known to you, in a peculiar fashion. It was like driving through a chain link fence, and down into a ravine. Go back into the peep booth! Obscure it, put in some drug experiences. An alternate rendition was made (like a cheese). Nothing left to do, too much (everything) probability. A sexual sex, occurred, even the shadows, had shadows. The impossible, is all that’s beautiful. Thank you for your business, now, please, leave here. When you see a cross section of a tree, flutter. Hard or soft water/redemption? Listen to my excuse: the signs were a rich neon. Depression, is fallen right into. Smell the walls of the old school, hold up a great many tools. Some cars are dented, and I don’t know what to say. It was the same cabbie, there is no sex, there is no hue, no hot water, or luck. Piss in your pants, why walk way over there? The coo-coo clock went coo-coo! Think about her thighs, those assholes, beautiful sidestreets, the fight that broke out. Shoegaze, tentatively (I am no longer a real person). Manipulate, wildly (this is not possible, any longer). The furniture is functioning, the dishes will not wash themselves, the toy is broken, it doesn’t spin around, anymore. You seem to all act like one another. Please understand, it’s all random. The stumbling through the groves? For a laugh or two, leaf through the faculty booklet. Forget the fucking parade! Please, try to ignore my face. Like a true, and horrible decay, you are ruining my life. Plead for calm, try to spill, be melancholy, lose your nerve. Say something, for no reason. Flipped with a stick, I am a woman. Wonderful things occur, but not here. Stunned at the intersection, I turned the microphone on. Hey, Athena (you go, girl). It’s like soil erosion (help us), it’s a postmodern, slide down. It’s like a guy with a foot fetish, at a turkey trot. His guts came out of his mouth. I feel like the four hundred pound man. Your breath, will be taken from you. We were born too late, born for the needle, heading for divorce, hell bent on destruction, love, tile floors. The lure seems so irresistible. Each one of those motels, have their own character. It seems to me that nothing is ever really over. Now, some uncharacteristic hitting. Be ambivalent, sleazy, ape-like, enlightened. The pool incident (and other things to stop remembering). Try to go further than I did. They clamor, I float, lick the like, out of Suzy. The chafing dishes were picked up exactly on time. I accuse you, I accuse you! Scatter the shattered. She spit in my ear. I just like to like to look at it, think about it, not actually, do it. This is the impossible, made manifest, right before your eyes. I’ll fail, mark my words! Do you remember that one guy, place, thing? If it ever happens, I won’t be around. It’s sort of comical, how impossible it all ends up being. String up some lights, to mortify the neighbors. I only thought that I was thinking! Don’t you understand? It’s all about money! Ticking time bombs, go off (watch out)! I don’t have a firm point, that I want to make. I kept resisting the urge, then, finally, one day, I just gave in! I set myself up for one doozy of a fall. Samuel Ellis, I stole your purple pencil! She used to quietly quilt, for hours. If we don’t purchase, we don’t exist (to them). Reach for what’s out of reach, like the motor oil. We don’t know what we want! The golf course was full of idiots. Part one in the series, was called, “The Hole.” It seemed really important to me, though, you know? It’s just, plain, impossible. Even my stool sample, was unacceptable. The nurse looked at me as if I were crazy. Some, succeed too easily (it seems). How did I miss all of these mistakes the other five times that I edited this? I can no longer afford to keep doing this. Someday, I’ll be gone, and someone else will waste their life, writing books (which are never even read). Like an itch you can’t scratch, we’ll be there. My collapse, was total. Why did I leave out the part about Watervliet? We just might make it (don’t count on it, though). You’ve got to be able to fit through the hatch. The stars turned into airplanes, which were after us. I screw up too much, or too often. My “wild years,” were followed by asterisks. We’re all just a little bit indecisive (maybe). Bodies at rest, annoyed us. Hide it, underneath this. We disappointed mercy, with our entanglements, and sleep schedules. I vomited blood into the freshly fallen snow. Inside the locket, a picture of a dead person. Bellow it out, like in the old days. Nothing that feels good, will last (refer to Buddha’s list). Who rang the ding-dong? Go for a flush and fill.
The wetlands, are flooded (wastelands, Westland). The rose bushes just weren’t able to adapt to the climate changes. Assume that everything’s in place (uh-oh). It just has to stop, end, whatever. Fink us, like sex on demand. Don’t try to buffalo me! I guess this how it will all end. We decided to be vulgar, to get attention. How can it be, after all of this? Is it that, this, is the only place to be, that’s real? I must’ve just, sort of, decided, to lose my mind. I was afraid to swing the bat, like punching in a dream. He claimed to have the whole collection. Pay attention to the things you can’t have. She must have forgotten to save it. I got drunk, loud, obnoxious. All we end up doing, is sleeping. It’s my version of the Bible, it fell short. This is how to stand. We had no idea, we still don’t. Buy a diamond ring, for little Delia Rose. My life will never begin, it seems. If you’re not crazy, you are one of them. Honest to goodness, what are we going to do? They are all so pleased with themselves, over there. Some of us, don’t mind being left behind. You can do without e-mail. Something else, about something else… This is where I belong. Sometimes, the stars just fall right out of the sky. Everybody is an asshole, or worse (simplification)! You’ve got to stop playing with plastic tits, in the basement. Refuse to leave your house, to hell with it all! Parched, perched, poached? My sex partner (pillow), just fell down to the ground. We’re not unhappy, life makes us this way. Opium mouth, took care of us. Hollow out the gourds, look back. Beware teenagers (frenzy). One of the best films, was Highland Park Skank. Dozing into slumber, in the middle of the day. Concepts, very fuzzy. Slap the hell out of him, at the Oasis. We don’t have a theme song. Laughter, is from terror, horror, worse. I want to stop caring, obsessing. They say that you can’t get rich, writing (oops). The truth is, that I can’t read. Maine evokes a feeling, a real feeling (total)! This was going to be beyond all limits. They won’t let you, “change things.” By now, my mind is completely gone. As for my real life, nothing ever happened. There is no, “secret song.” Go on, and swing, like an old kite, stuck high up in a tree. From time to time, we want to be upset. We can’t hide our excitement, and if it’s excitement we want, we head to the craft store! We work, at nothing, for nothing (really). Some group, or society of some kind, will denounce me, ban the book, and all that other shit. They know what I don’t. Question just about everything. It’s a racket, and a trap (avoid such things). You’ll never know who’s fault it was. Give us the final come-uppance. I thought I was a genius, I am the (ham man) opposite. In the end, this isn’t even all that creative. Nobody is ever home. I did the same thing last time, and the time before, ad infinitum. I know who I am, this, I want to be someone, or something, else. After all the rest of it, they’ll spell your name wrong. Every page is like an accident! I broke all the rules, did it my own way, as they say, to my own peril. Why did I scratch that itch? Everything is false, including that. I just wanted my life to mean something. The second half is the exciting part. There isn’t a hell of a lot to write about, anymore. All the straights, will turn gay! It’s not always in red. Oh, the Cabaret Artaud! I’m trying to shread this into some kind of substance. Imagine that the pan was hanging on the wall. Sediment will collect in the bottom of the pool. Offend as many people as you can, get them all riled up! Can’t handle the autonomy? Bull and bear, guns, butter (here we go). I zig-zagged, for some time. You can’t do, what you did before. I decided not to save anything for, “next time.” It’s as simple as sabotage. This was supposed to be the final, published version. You’ve gotta’ write your own ticket, Smiley. Just the mere glimpse of a bikini, gets my sausage, active. A lot of everything (not all), was included. This was going to be a good thing, for a lot of people, it wound up being a very bad thing, for only one. Now, my farts come out of my mouth. Who’s the invalid, invalid? The heat affects my neck. Oh, sure, I guess it was fun, for awhile. It’s just the cognitive dissonance theory, at work. Let’s get it right! We just don’t know what to do. Here we are, just leaving. There are a lot of repetitions. There are a lot of repetitions. I used to imagine that one day, I’d have a life (well, nothing doing). He knew all of the queer wrestling moves! Why should we have a damn, show? Basically, the hospital for the insane, hurt my feelings. We have nothing to do.
We’re laying pipe, now. One last double check, and I’m gone (it’s taken way too many years). Describe the defeat, the love you stood in line for. Don’t take it out on your genitalia. We like to watch, not engage in any kind, or sort, of Katmandu. Well, the book thing, fell through. We want real lives, not this shit that we have, at present. To me, a woman’s foot, is like an inside out vagina, and way more thrilling, exciting. The computer ate it all. I’m starting to show some symptoms. You are all afraid of your own selves. I guess we all must secretly, want someone to tell us what to do, how to live, etc. Wade through it, like butter. There is a weasel in the moon. It just never happened for me, and probably, never will. Tollway fears, and the missing hopscotch box. Someone said something, about evil. My madness became something I could no longer rationalize, handle, or control. I work on this damn thing, all day, every day. Tools need to be used. They won’t be skimming through this, at the ladies bookclub. Then, another day. Everybody in the computer lab, looked dead, to me. I am a River Phoenix, sort of. This is too (picture yourself, alive) unconventional, nobody will buy it. There will only (bloom, Dilly) be more pain. No more adventure, or excitement, ever. If I’m going to put something beautiful in here, this is my last chance. Why did we even build these structures? Did you see the are, bend? Does it seem like a long time, to you? What could have been, is always better than what would have happened. I am the Wizard of Nod, and this is my needle strewn, and broken vodka bottle strewn, road to nowhere. Lauren, baby, where are you? Things change, sure, but not for the better. You were so rude to me, in the dream. It still needs so much fixing. She had such freshness, such wholesomeness. Flop down over by the mildewed tent, in sorrow. Well, it isn’t exactly what it was supposed to be. Swing a big fist, into a soft, fleshy, face. I’ve learned, but it took so long. If you don’t believe what they believe, they are not going to like you. The anger and fear, are scattered here and there, ma’am. It was some sort of wild assed, AM radio broadcast. There is a trail through the forest, that I’d like to tell you about. You press down too hard with the pencil. Not too many of us, will ever amount to anything. At first, you’ll be afraid to start, and then later, to stop. Lemon oil was used, to clean the place, top to bottom. Cover the spread, taunt a hi-low driver, smile, slap a mailman. What’s the big deal, anyway? They started to hate me, at about the time that I was finally able to stand them. Milla and I, did some twisted shit? What do you remember (this is a pick up line)? That’s all you get, for acting so silly. Why have I done, what I’ve done? Go on down to the basement, they’re waiting for you. The best way to go, is straight through. We all had our chances, in the kiosks. Help me, please (drill it, drill it). Well, which one is the puppeteer? We’re too poor to buy a second television. She used to wear a half of a heart, around her neck, nobody really knew why. The dressing table was out in the yard. She said she’d play the game of being my wife (what?). Of course, I’d been drinking, back then, there was an awful lot of drinking. We’re all dying, each of us, in our own, unique, ways. A makeshift parade, was staged. The politicians will continue to do nothing, except talk, do not be surprised. They want me to stand trial, I can’t even stand up! The deluge stopped me, cold. Mirrors, fields, full of crops, we’re trying to get it right, once and for all. See, one side must match the other. Where is the meat of this? A lot of things contributed to my overall insanity. At some point in our lives, all of us, could have been one of those asshole guests, on one of those t.v. talk shows. They play a lot of ping-pong, over there. Try some subliminal messages. Launch in, like a benevolent despot, buy a souvenir. This is the fling into the bakery pans, that I was fearing. Fold the rags, in a certain, prescribed, way. We’re not exactly sure, are we? Be against most everything. He was really high, on some kind of inhalant. It takes up way too much of my time (this). I said that wasn’t the way it was, but, it was. Do what the cadaver, did. We know what was in the pail, man! They deliver packages here, late at night. It’ll never be the way that I want it to be. Zinc, like the farm animals? I guess that I forgot how to climb. I’m looking ahead, foolishly. After all of this, what have I really done? Most people don’t think about death, quite as often, as myself. Why do I continue to do the things that I do, and nothing else, when none of these, are working? All you need, is a hardware store. Pull out some panties, and sniff ‘em. Scary, is all there is.
