008

Candles, ashes, blood, Styrofoam. Another series of shrill cries, from the damned. Slide, the fast way, get it done. I beg your pardon, all of you. They keep us too busy to question anything. My detractors will be powerful, well connected. They make them out of wax. Are you listening? They won’t tell. There is no easy way, to do anything. Take your easy answers, and shove them! I feel it, I feel it, and it’s too late for prevention, now. Hump, like a horny guy in a boat. There ain’t no more silliness, or sunshine. Like the permanent squeeze. We are all in pain, we work at night. They tore the treehouse out of the tree. She was my popcorn girl. Dental health, low mileage. I can barely move, anymore. We lie to ourselves, quite a bit. This doesn’t seem like it’s in English. It’ll all come unglued, it will fall apart. Nobody is really, truly, innocent. We’re living every single question, out there. We sat in the parking lot of the First Presbyterian church, drinking warm beer. No hope, is really not true. Lick it like it was a dandelion. Throw the cat’s scratch toy, through the wall. The computer screws everything up, it’s designed into the program. It’s all for sale, or lease (why don’t they just give up?). I can’t help feeling, that I haven’t done enough. Yeah, but can you stand on top of it? They gave us plenty of chances. Worm like, I slither, and slide. Sweet pea, this is for you (oh, I love you, baby). We used to laugh more, at the impossibility of it all (something changed). Well, everything may be different, but not better. Don’t rush through the editing. Tear out the integrity, tape it on the wall. It was all camouflaged, in. Don’t be privy, to nothin’. I just can’t take it, anymore. She was sexy, not anymore, no one knows what happened, all of the sudden (marriage). Being happy, is just not our lot, nor should it be. I can’t make up my mind (no way, do not be glib). It’s like a closed head injury… New yellow, starts before, “can you see?” All references to god, death, meaninglessness, suicide, and so on, have been removed. We just need to switch some things around, now. We bought dirt. The distress is still present. There isn’t a cloud in the sky. Why are we the way we are? I’m getting the distinct impression, that I’ve been found out. The paper has become quite conscious. Rub up against them, next time. Them asses is fine, for fuckin! I put in countless applications… It’s all in here, but it’s not enough. The economic system is so false, so faux. Stay out of the workaday world. Communities and cultures, are bullshit. All I do, everyday, is sit there. Yes, I do believe that there were some very strong feelings. I now despise the sound of lead, moving across paper. I’d be happy just to see it, in it’s final form. What do they expect us to do? Wait. That’s what all the fuss is about, a toilet paper roll? It’s so pointless, and repetitive; that it’s tragic, dangerous. This has been such a waste of time, that it’s finished me. I used to be a riot, but that was before all of this. You don’t even need that much of an imagination, anymore (it’s right out in the open). Do you see it, the shit worth taking pictures of? This is the way that they want it! I erased the part about what I wanted to do with that girl who lives over there. The little things, will floor you. Where is my red pencil, now? Just leave the repetitive parts, in. I can’t stop, and it will cost me. Nothing ever happens (changes), really. Green was the myth of the… There isn’t any time, to do things, right. Whir along, like the steam in the windows. There are things we can do, and those we cannot. I am the living embodiment, of Hong Kong. We’re stuck in our lives, our secret identities, we are not rousing successes. I guess I was supposed to be dead, before now (my obituary, was short). Bitch, I’m depressed/distressed, for real reasons! Everything is so damn, extreme. This is my last chance, it also happens to be my only chance. We sweat, like Earl used to. Sweet girl, the shirt said. I tried to make something of myself, and look what happened! Piece of metal, with hole inside! It was all supposed to roll, much smoother. It’ll never be enough, at all, in any way. This is actually worse than death (this life, from time to time). After what we’ve been through, we beware. Pick your nose, over near the spice rack. Sitting in traffic, wondering, “Why me”? there is no more to hum. Up, one, two, spaces? Some wine, was spilled, evidently. Remember the apple blossoms! You were the owl, you were the owl. Get up, and live, shout it out. Hedge, disengage, be incomplete, a motel dweller. Flutter, little butterfly girl. Torture is better than this. The weirdest thing is, they already know, they see you as exactly who/what, you are. Ham hocks, up, and deep inside of you. What will be your trademark? It’s another lost cause. There is no way of knowing. The pink towel, was used. I can’t get up off the cold, barren ground. I inspired myself with nudie pictures (see below). It filled up. Stop it, please stop it. That’s fucked up (her name is in there, somewhere). It isn’t done. Let me disguise myself. This is nuts! There is some regularity. The sound of rain is all we have, now. Eat grease, fat fuck. We need time. You’re like a psycho, what is this shit? It wasn’t just, it was a lagoon. I’m worried about your mind, this has to stop. I partially crossed the street. It won’t get any better. You sanded my garage, you keep me up at night. My ignorance dumbfounds me. Put in the orders. I swear that if I wanted to… I could put you in a mental institution. Are you high, or drunk? Please, look, can’t we just forget all this play acting and bullshit, and go back to the way things used to be? I masturbated with that ladies underpants. You’ll see, one day. I love you, or, used to. Define this “better self.” You are you, to criticize me? Who are you? Where are we going, when we go out? I mean, you’re gone. This is too much, and it’s gone too far. Have you called your mother lately? Let’s see a Doctor, this is really beyond my capacity to understand…and this can’t go on. Sarah, please… You are nothing but the living personification of semen, you are nothing but semen to me. Flick the snot over there. Let’s try to avoid certain parts of this. He gave into the fear. Where is the rookery? It just isn’t going to work out. There was a woman at the zoo, who made people horny. This is the fear that knows no bounds. Bleed English, all over the latin bible. Oh, what a novel idea (pick an idea, any idea). Fly that crazy contraption home. Trees do not “just attack people! Flip over the organ stool and holler (until the end of time). Concentric circles engulf us, like fire. Indeed, I understand curiosity. Do they still have the ice rink inside? Thank goodness for naughty girls. I feel very foul, all the time. It was condemned and torn down, before I could move out. They say I took the easy way, out.

I hear the noises, again (am regarded as a maniac). There are more depressing things. By a wave of the hand, or, better yet, a wave of the wand (penis)… total cures. It’s like, on purpose. One day we’re alive, the next, we’re dead. Just like in Poland, the glasses were clinked, the candles, blown out. She was a woman of bad behavior. Food is too expensive, I’d just assume be in the hospital. Stay off the wrong side of the street, copper. Worry is tension on top of tension. Spin out silly nonsense, like nothing. This is exactly what it’s like to be crazy. Await instructions, very close (airport). There would appear to be a lack of balance, here. Go to where the torn down building, was. So smug, so damn smug, and partial. Face the cartel, down. Nothing connects. You will never understand my pain, nor will I, understand yours. My hate will be my end. We fucked on the floor, like animals (but, psst, secret). It’s over, it’s high time to lay all this shit aside. It’s the terror of ourselves. The crows dive bombed the hawk during an apparent dispute of some kind. The time may indeed, be now. Surrounded by these prohibitions. I grew up on a farm. You are as foolish and crazy as your female descendents. Some things, do repeat. Explore the anti-itch toilet seat. Norman went overboard. Try to stay asleep. Speak of your contemptuous resentment. Make me! Anti-decency’ll get you far. Piss on the faces of the ones who hate you. I put some items in a box. Society is only a morality play. The numb, blank, walk forward, is getting dull. Bring back the bullshit! At the last stop, wonder. Moods play too much of a part in our lives. Let the rich, golf. Not everyone can afford, “the basics.” Back to the rescue mission for another hand out. Sometimes, I get so damn upset. Put this elixir on your cysts. Descartes was a fish! There are no next steps to take, it ends here. You can’t have my entire life. Because I can cure you of your sins. I had my fucking chance, and blew it. Stop hurting (and waiting). This is my last chance for any kind of life at all, and though you don’t care, I do. I know it isn’t in your mind, Senator. Understand the differences, in genetic terms. Do what is painful, to stop the pain. We’re the few, who don’t want to be movie stars. They know what you’re doing. Some, would rather be dead than alive (the dead). There was a closed down potato chip factory up there, too. Mexico was a travesty, the football was sliced in half. I’m not a “positive thinker.” The whole damn thing, is crazy. There are a few tastes or flavors as rich, as blood. Don’t give up, or in, ever. Things are unbearable, I am unconscious. A little bit of terror, never hurt anybody. Take some advice from the dead. Sissy ain’t got nothin’ on you, baby. Play hopscotch over by the railroad tracks. Insanity strikes, like a snake. At least, act straight. My demeanor is unpleasant. Figure it out for yourselves. Seek expert help, do the cha-cha, wear gloves. You’ll try to run out the side. You have a few problems. Build it, construct it! We’re all statistics, there is no voodoo trickle down. I mean no disrespect, but I do not believe the “miracle drink” pitch, one iota. The steamroller does what it does to our plans, and our dreams. It’s like the sound of urine, splashing into the toilet bowl. Welcome to the good stuff (this is a lie). Cut out the desserts. Three wet days in the… She wore sweaters in the summer (see, nipples). Silly, will not get you very far. How can anyone even really explain anything? It’s because of what I did. You got a thing with corn. Blast the deformities out of yourself, navigate this. Pig’s feet are being pickled, as we speak. I am no longer accepting rejection letters, as of this time. My thoughts are not my own, at all. Go ahead, curl up in the back of the boat. It’s as if we had lives. Cry, until you can’t. Get it off my face, I’m warning you. Cherish simplicity. Cut, someone yelled. You’re isolated, noisy, absolute, dainty, irresponsibile… Someone pushed over an old man in a walker. It’s time for life, not this thing. The only way to be taught, is to teach yourself. I couldn’t cross the road. Resentment and rage, can so easily get out of control. The name of the place, is forgotten. I urinated on the frog statue in the backyard. I’m covered in my own blood. Go a little overboard from time to time. Yelling, about the incomprehensibility. Soon enough, you will find yourself without any friends. The yellow curtains keep attacking me. My power to transform and change, is gone. He had it all straight, early. Think it up, get it down. More dull sorrow. Plans are not poured into concrete, to say the least. I got beat to the fame bag. Maybe I did kick that basket over. There are not going to be any aliens to take your stupid asses, anywhere. None of our studies, can be applied here. He tried to make love to his sister’s stuffed animals (they were uncooperative). It isn’t the end, but it is near the end. Screaming and yelling, won’t accomplish anything. Turn the heat off. The laughter has waned…