Don’t spend all your money, on ingrates. Two more, like this, with less, paranoia, and, we’ll take it, from there. What I’m trying to do, prove, or, be, remains, unknown, even to, myself. How can I pick up/fix, that cushion, it is, the stuffing, is torn out, of the thing. How can I hide the fact, of my troubling, and troubled, appearance (if not, nature), in the midst, of the interview? Years, right on the brink, well, I finally fell over, congratulations, your years of invisible pushing, against what you cannot, understand, have finally, paid off. There is too much talk, about passing away, and needing to be taken care, of, in here, lately. I miss the dead and gone, so terribly, that joining them, in nowhereland, just seems preferable, to struggling along, in this slipslot, shitpot, shucked off, planet. I don’t have a few days, to sit around, waiting for somebody, to make up their minds, I am down to my last piece of fatback, there is no career, there are no paths, to clear, or, forge, through. Music, somehow, allows more wholesale crap, to be unleashed, onto the weary consumers, literature, is more picky, and choosy. The assignments, don’t get tossed our way, anymore, we have to make up our own, now. Yes, I describe the, problems, but only in hopes, at arriving at some kind of a solution, to them. My crow imitation, didn’t go over well, at the dentist’s office. Was it only, yesterday, that I considered, throwing it all, away (not that there is, anything, to throw away)? I poke at myself, like a cadaver, with the rusty instruments, that I find, laying around here, at random. I’m not interested, in milking the cow, any cow, and I don’t care, if this makes me appear, selfish, though, I think, the opposite reaction, is more appropriate. There is a book of poetry, in front of me, it says, that I wrote it, but, well, I have my doubts. Our guts, are always, in the way. The peaches, seemed (boing, your ass, up) to march, into the sunshine. Feel, more rabid. There is a pattern, of inclement weather, there is trash, to take to the curb, a dog, to walk, and dishes, to be washed. You were (I can’t help it) staring, at her, again. The real selves, will come out, eventually. Soon, there will be no ass, to sit down, on, count on it, that’s the first thing, that’s going to be shot, off. The bookstore, is full of young girls, who are not only, too attractive, for their own good, but, completely unaware, of how insanely, unimaginably, striking, they are. We’ve got to show both sides, of the issue(s). It’s easy enough, to tell, when people, are lying. When you think that you’re the least able, to, “take it,” anymore, is just the beginning, of the journey. Into the open, whether, we opened it, or, found it, open, doesn’t really matter. It wasn’t/it was, for the most part, all names, but, not faces, or, the other way, yet again. This is all, probably, invention, on my part, it usually, is. I’ve always been a **, and will always be a ***. I firmly, do not believe, in the concept, of love, or, all the irrelevant things, that inadvertently, go along, with it. Baby, tomorrow, is such a long, long, way, away. The people, who were extremely fond, of who? Things are getting, worse. Look at this, mess! I’m doing it, again (fucking up). Don’t give a shit, or, a flush, about us, either way, don’t try to deny, having wittingly, or, unwittingly, conscious, or unconsciously, having/had, oh, it’s not like I set about, attempting to change people, no, never. In regards to what, wasn’t, don’t worry about it, I mean, it, wasn’t. I guess, you could say…ah, who are we… fooling? Hellion, sue your ex-employer, pleasure yourself, burn those plastic, flag replicas. My evasions, and ambiguities, will catch up to me, someday. There they were, at some, resort. Make it, stop.
By the time a person is thirty, all sexy feelings, had better be, gone. Just what we need, more time, to, forage. As far as I’m concerned, you’re eight, behind! I was absolutely, astonished, by the built-in, vacuum cleaner, I couldn’t believe it (having never seen, nor, heard of one, before). Is there a pill, that I can take, to solve some of my problems, one that won’t cause, other problems? I really do, have to go, I don’t know, where, but, I’ve got to go there, and do something. The pain, in your thumb, will go away, in time, the wrinkles, on your face, won’t, in fact, they will become, more prominent. Sixty years ago, something, happened, somewhere. It just happens to be, Monday, it, could be, any day, they are all the same. It just happens to be, 2:02 P.M., it could be, anytime. My car, has defective brakes, now, I want to burn something, down. There have been days, when I would have liked, very much, to pay for, what I couldn’t get, and thought I needed, very much, now, it’s, all, “what’s the use,” and, I’d rather get a little more, sleep. Beware the factors, that you didn’t include, on your self assessment, forms. For a change, of the same, sad, and sorry, state of affairs, that you continually, engage in, for once, end the sex act, at arousal. Everyone will find out your, “little secrets,” so, don’t even try, to keep them; in general, don’t try. Drip dry, your way, to the deathbed, thinking, could I really have made, a good priest? Put your nametag, on, hey, where’s your nametag, you’ve got to have a nametag! We’re still a little bit, alive, we’re, into this, it may, very well, not make any difference, but, we’re into this. I set my hair on fire, did that thing, with the pencil, things happen, and don’t, it certainly, isn’t up to us, what does, or, doesn’t. I am here, to tell you all, one thing, and one thing, only, but, I’ve forgotten, what it was. We’re required, to send that thing, and get the other, whoa, sexy girl, is working the swing shift, down at the store, tonight! Erosion, took care of my ambivalence. Some things, we want to, will never, happen. They want/require, that I send in, three, published clips, hmm, ha, ha, ha, ha! If it is, then, for sure, it, isn’t. Lines, can I help, you’s, thank you’s, full time, vacuuming, all that, just, all that. If you want to act, act, do it, right now. The prick, blocked in, my car, to really, let me know, that parking in his space, was not permissible, these were not his exact, words. Favors, aren’t returned, automatically, in fact, usually, there is no reciprocation, at all. Well, I get a little overzealous, sometimes, they’re all… now, we’re looking for something else, some, other thing, we know not, what, that we will never find. Bring the strangulation victim, back to life, just, one more thing, we’ve got to do. Take off your pants, indicate, that fucking, is going to take place, by getting some kind of oil, out of the kitchen. It was pointed out, to me, that this is a stock plan, that I, “don’t want to pass up.” Cold, or, otherwise, there are a lot of other people, that get stripped, like this. If, and when, any of this, ever meant anything, don’t worry, I’ll be sure, to clue you, in. We’re electrochemical, this cannot be, denied. Sorrow, is nothing on the table, and most, all, memories, unfortunately. I saw the farm girl, wanted to fuck her, evenly. Maybe, I’ve, sinned. We maneuvered, so deftly. We do things, in our own, foolish, ways. Scratch and sniff, with your socks, off.
You smell like a, falcon, I’m some kind of, hermaphrodite. This is very unstable ground, sir. Think, fists, in faces, or, worse, the next time you get an idea, about, “indiscretion,” in your goddamn, wayward, head. Time, oh, forget it, give up. Naturally, the thing, is, to see the flash of gold, in the pan, but, if it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen. Perhaps, I’m only pretending, to be an isolationist, but, I don’t think so, I don’t spend a lot of time, on the phone, to say the least. This is not exactly, my idea, of pleasure, either, sister. Wait, two beats, then, attack! We reminisce, nostalgically. A window, just opened, and the bird, flew out, now, I know, that it can’t survive, in this climate, and/or, environment. There has got to be a way, to break through this condition, this syndrome. I keep becoming, what I tell myself, never to, become. We’ve got to get through, it. We need a noose, a nozzle, a hose, something. Teach us, anything! It is all connected, but, not in the way, that a phrase like that, is usually, applied. Take it to the World, what is worked out, in one area, can be applied, to the other. It is very important, to learn to do, what you do, wherever you are. The great, big, arch, backward, that we all wait, and hope, for…isn’t what we thought it was, going to be, if, and when, it ever, gets here. The money, gets away from us, as it is wont, to do, and we get left, with the empty wallet, watching everybody else, leisurely, buy, lunch. You run away, pffssst, huh? Now, suddenly, somehow, it is, after. Damn, I need a full-time, job, this isn’t clown around, time, anymore. The school uniforms, are folded, neatly, and, slowly, over time, find their way, to the bottom drawer, of the dresser, underneath many other articles of clothing, we don’t care, if we ever see, again. Now, it is sunny, again. The gnome, is in the garden, where he, belongs. When the horse shit, got to be (it’s hard, for me, to stand up), too much, they invented, the automobile (do that, now). Hmm, back to the, pencil, corresponds to, increased speed, an interesting, hypothesis. Let go, give up, see, your own, end. It’s the ordinary, grind. Are there, tell me, are there, or, are there not, worms, in my intestines, right now? I can’t move, without bumping into, walls. Skin, is so, inflatable. The way that I shift, shake, stretch, and move, as I write, you would think, that I was some kind of athlete. It is soup, they are all, soups, don’t you dare, try to force me, to smell my own, ass. The bank, foreclosed, on us, just like they always, have, just as we expected, they would. Lust, is the bang, bang, of your heart, in a vigorous game, of hide and go seek, but, different. We can’t put things, straight, even if we wanted to. Hours of music, we do not want to hear, keeps happening, to us. This is not the place, to be sitting. Pick up your shit, from, where? On top of the oven, is, has, got to be, where the salt shakers, are kept? Maybe, doesn’t happen, often enough, we’re hooked, on seldom, here. The endless, and the short, the absence, and the tears. Are things starting to become as bad, as they used to be (I, more than, hope, not)? I think I heard somebody, talking about a twenty-five cent (we’re, bloating) raise, at the end of the month. If only, rich people, could be more creative, in how they throw their money, away. Where is the proper place, and what, is the correct way, to whoop-dee-do? We’re disaffected, something’s, I don’t know, about the “writer,” part, yet. The lists, are to be used, as a sort of, tool, not to be treated, as rigid, deterministic, laws, that are set, in stone. Death, is the absolute end, of everything, for us. A diamond, to dream, in/of/wish, for? No therapy, we are not, in therapy. Better days, had best, be, happening, soon, or, yes, I probably, will become, very angry. One door, opens, another, tree, falls, the football player, smashed the television. I don’t breathe, anymore, I don’t see, the point! I keep misplacing, my cigarettes, there are no parties, tonight, when will, they/I, realize, how full of shit, they/I, am, are? How anyone, even gets, halfway, to one, in this day, and age… see, it will never be, the way we want it, to be. We do a lot, of driving. It’s like a, toothpick.
The book, is going to be a lot longer, than I thought it was, going to be. Everything I do, is a trick, designed to fool myself, and they all, seem to, work. Sometimes, we fart, sometimes, we don’t, the body, knows how to take care of itself. I should have asked, about the, snails. There is still, such a long, long, way, to go, these interruptions, keep happening, damn, so, is it cloudy, or, not? We’ll tackle the rest of that laundry, tomorrow. It is beyond the time, to start, concentrating. M: (outside door, under breath), “that fuckin’ bitch.” (Woman enters, from door, into apartment lobby). I need to try, to be up, by, 12:30. There is no time, for an injury, now. As far as we can surmise, at the present time, union membership, is not increasing. A dividend, is the money, paid to stockholders, from company earnings. The employees, are referred to, as, “human resources,” like tin, lumber, or, camels. No…don’t…allow (try golf) the…to…the…uh…and; oh, shucks, it is time to begin, maintaining, things, clearly, and boldly. There is nothing quite like, just, going at it, like some species, of animal, on all, fours. Take off, that ever, elusive, but, still attached, comprehensive, label. We’ve forgotten, what it was, we meant, to finish. So many people, are so…let’s just say, that their presence, isn’t, all too, often, required. You, are not the, we, of the you, and I. No more hello/what’s up/nothing, banter, to bounce, back, and forth, like ping-pong balls. Who, isn’t, a mishmash, a conglomerate? I stared, and embarrassed, myself. I despise this book, with all of my being. To express a lot, in few words…to claim to be privy, to a kind of an aspect, that is part, of a facet, that…idea, about the house, or, the interracial, love affair. Scramble it up, like XXX, cable. They can eat your face! Crawl all over, the floor. To steal away, for a shower, or, sneak off, for some meal, that doesn’t matter, because, the, “evidence, is disposed of…” Where did we learn, the stupid tricks, we’ve learned? The man in red sweat pants, at the truck stop, will suck our dicks (vulgar), for five dollars, he informed us. Flitty, quit flinching, and, no, a 2.8, is not good, enough. The bobbing monkey, attempted to recite the alphabet, blast the bread, the taste of the bottle, is a lot like, soap. Should I attempt, to put all of this crap, together, into some sort, of meaningful, order? Sometime, in a cornfield, Oklahoma, will be, shucked. Steer clear, of the, Mall of Saskatchewan, the lesbo, loves Vegas, part-time, button up, live, the luster. It seems like the two, don’t work, as one. The “absurd predicaments,” that I attempted, to describe…no one, throws a thousand dollars, out, without expecting it, back, I am no exception, to that rule. If you don’t mind, I’m going to petition, some office, or, the other, in order to avoid, having to take any, foreign language, or, “hippie studies,” courses. It’s a long drive, to that dead-end, street, lots of lefts, buildings, apartments. Oh, yeah, lavish, just, lavish, indexes! Council, was sought, but, we ended up, not wanting it, after all. These fraud charges, will not stand up, in court! It’s no longer, Leningrad, baby, so, let’s party, tonight. It was, all there, I can’t explain it, even if my life, depended upon it, it, all, came together. Too many secrets, are being kept, as it is, but, we’ll get to that, later. Peculiar glances, confuse, matters. I can’t go through the whole thing, again. Oh, but, I will.
Pick the lock, get in the truck, hee, ho, oh, no! Self castration, saves precious, time, and energy. It’s the real, out there, world, that we are concerned with, here. I don’t call anybody, “pumpkin,” anymore. To anyone, who may be, interested, modern institutions, for the insane, can be viewed, as, and be, compared to, hotels, in every, imaginable, way. It costs too much money, to earn an MBA. I don’t know about you, but I want my tail, and foreskin, back. No, officer, there is no pedophile action, going on. All the library books, smell exactly, like, our attic. Keep your sunny side up, bullshit, to yourselves. Well, I finally found page, 169, which had been missing, for, months. Whore’s, will spread their legs, but, they also, get paid, very well, to do, so. Relieve the tension, buy the double cassette, fake the entrance exam; in order for this place, to function, we’ve all got to work harder, for the cause. This is one of those things, that begins, and ends, with, what it is. The more time, we waste, searching for good times, the worse, and worse, off, we are going to find ourselves, in, a little further, on, down the line. Yeah, the trilliums, will bloom, but, we’re going to be doing laundry, or, working overtime, that day. The noble, are as fallible, and replaceable, as, us, serfs. Don’t get your hair, caught in the lathe. Seventeen bodies, section D, as in, diagnosis? Momentum, hasn’t been getting me up, or down, the hills, as well, as it once, did, and, one thing is, certainly, not, leading to, the other. Repeat, the refrain. The limo, pulled up, for he people, next door. Complication, I the nae, of the same. The unfinished (wash your ass), business, that we have, with our allies, enemies, associates, and detractors, must be resolved, before we can move on, to any kind, of anything, else. That, can’t miss, appointment, was. All these years, of fuckups, don’t get us, any reprieves, from the next ones, especially, since, the old ones, cause, the new ones. Baby, I’m looking for a sense of balance, in my life. The chump change, was deposited, the middle finger, was extended, into the air, at no one, in particular. I almost got killed, today (again), pulling out into, traffic, my window, was fogged up, no heater, in the car, I couldn’t see the yellow lines, or, much of anything, boy, do I miss the days, of getting laid, occasionally, over in the grass, on the side of the Campus Towers, apartments. Is that crazy man, really going to show us, how to shave, our tongues? She was as stable, as stable, could be, she was not, “fishy,” like the other girls. This is just like, prison. There is too much. Be leery, of the bonafide. Crash! We thought life, was going to be a whole lot, different. Can I persuade you, to pay for your own cremation, in advance? Reflect it, refract it, do something, with it. They have the right, to fuck around, look at, them. In other words, ask. Our behavior, is/was, somewhat, unusual (long pause). They will poke, at your, sore, spots. They don’t let you take your houseplants, with you, look, all I want to do, is jump up, and down, on a daisy, maybe, hop, from there, and hide, in a tulip, I don’t know. She knew, that you were fascinated, with her/him. We need to pretend, to be more technical, than we are, and act, less, finicky. This needs to be, over, this needs to be over, with, already. Don’t, stop, oversleeping. It never took too long, to find things, back then. We’re all doing the same shit, in different ways; oh, by the way, the guy, in the van, returned. Just take one word, from there, and one from there, and put them together, and just, see what happens. The kitchen table, is no place for Homo Sapiens, to engage in sexual intercourse, or, any other kind. Brenda, is a bitch, so, bubble gum, so, so, bubble gum. People are always going to be doing, something, pumping gas, watching television, attending poetry readings, or, movie premieres, reading books, writing letters, dancing. Dry heave, ejaculations, like the double headed, dildos. Rattlesnakes, give warning, few, others, do. This street, was once, dirt. I don’t spend much time, thinking about my future. Spend your, sac-buck’s.
